Little Moments x Life

We all go through a "phase" in our lives where we think of what has become of us and go, "Am I happy or not?". Or, we try to label ourselves as either successful or a failure. Unfortunately for me, today I have decided that I am, in fact, a failure. It seems hypocritical to hear this from someone who strives to find positivity in everything, doesn't it? I hate to break it to you folks, but I am still human. I love helping others build their success stories but I just can't seem to get mine together.

Don't get me wrong; I have an amazing family, a very loving girlfriend, good grades, but that just isn't enough. I don't know. I feel like I could have done more in the past three years. Must I say I regret not having done what I should have? Yes and no.

Am I a failure? Maybe.

But it isn't too late to become something more. I just hope life lets me catch up.

I find myself very happy when I am around people. I guess that's just innate of us. But when I find myself alone, I overthink things. I look back and blame myself for things I have done, should have done, and might not do. It's quite complicated.

Bottomline is, I think too much. And it isn't the healthy kind.

School, the future, jitters

I have been at a loss for words for the longest time. I don't know why. It could be because I am often overwhelmed by my thoughts and the many things that are happening that I can't seem to pick the right words, the perfect ones that equate to the emotions that come with them. Then I forget I ever planned on writing about them. And I am only left with thoughts and grand memories that I feel will be blogged eventually.

Right now, I feel like telling you that I just paid my registration deposit for next semester. It may seem very odd, reading something so irrelevant and out of the blue, but I am just excited. I register for my classes on the 17th, and if I do that successfully, then I am a semester closer to getting my AA degree. AWWW YEAH. I am desperate to get into a particular writing class - a priority, a first concern, a transcendence - and I am hoping to get the same professor I had last spring. But I really do not want to expect anything since we (or I) know how woopty doo well that went last time. Although honestly, I am very much hopeful. I am desperate. I am actually left with no choice.

I feel desperate for so many things right now. But I can't complain with what I have either.

How are you?